Fellow tipsters, I know I didn’t predict the Pies to blast the Swans to smitherines. Nor did I tip The Hawks narrow victory over the hapless Crows.

But I did say emphatically that all games could go either way. And I was 100 percent correct! So, despite the view of some sceptics that I only scored two out of four, I argue that I got them ALL right.

Besides, the emphasis last week was on match attendances and, of course, Taber’s nose. Re attendances, I got everyone right, at least to the nearest 20,000. Regarding Taber’s nose, we received 32 estimates, the closest being Cathy Taber who insists that his nose is proportional to all of his other appendages. Unfortunately Cathy was disqualified for having inside information meaning that the prize of a bottle of Jim Beam is carried over to this week’s brain teaser:

When Ben Cousins plays, what are the contents of his drinks bottle? 

Anyway, this week’s tips:

Game 1. Being a Collingwood supporter, I am loathe to tip Collingwood in a final, especially an away final. But, Ga Phi Linh*, Vietnam’s number one AFL tipster, has put his five storey house in Hai Ba Trung on a Pies victory. If he’s that certain, I’m going against a history of Collingwood finals let-downs and following suit. That is, the Woods to win by 5 points in a thriller. Attendance 52,341. First goal kicker: Dean Cox.

Best on Ground: Nathan Buckley (38 disposals, 2 goals, 3 tackles, 4 sheppards) * pronounced Gut Feel Ling

Game 2. Roos to bounce back forcing the young Hawks out of the finals race and into end of year trip preparation mode. Tip is, they’re off to Queenstown, Tasmania this year, courtesy Jeff Kennett. Winning margin 25 points. Attendance: 13 – not too many care about who wins as both teams won’t feature in the Big One. 

First Goal Kicker: Buddy Franklin. Best on Ground: Glen Archer.

Go Pies!!!